Sunday, July 28, 2024

2024. Week XXXI

 Hello Internet,

I am nearing the end of Persona 3: Reload, which is good.  Before summer started, I had set two gaming goals: beat Persona 3: Reload and beat Final Fantasy VII: Rebirth.  I have already finished Rebirth and loved it, and I am now clearing Reload as I'm running out of time.

Both games were a lot, and both games came out within a month of each other.  They were my Christmas and Birthday gifts from last year, but they released in February.  I finished Rebirth either just before we or just after moved and am still reeling from it.  It was a good game.  Surprising. Fun.  There were choices made at the end that I didn't like, but I'd say that I overwhelmingly enjoyed the ending and felt like it elevated the entire three-game project.

Reload is longer and slower.  I've beaten the original game, Persona 3, before, and before Reload was released, I got very, very far into Persona 3 Portable, which is one of the many versions of the game (though I was playing the female route in that game; Reload has no female route).  All of that said, it's getting a little taxing.  I'm only a few in-game days away from finishing the story, though, so I am putting my all into that.

I've been anxious about video games lately and have had a lot of FOMO surrounding them and other media.  I've spent a good chunk of my summer writing and rewriting lists to try and help me focus and bring me comfort, and when I do that, it takes away from the joy I have in those things.  It makes relaxation into a chore, and I feel it sapping the warmth and joy from things I typically enjoy.

I think a lot of it has to do with how stressful things have been lately.  Between Monkey's cancer and Kangaroo entering his terrible twos and school starting and Ratatoskr's, well, everything, I just feel pulled so thin.  I want to support everyone, and I don't want to be a burden or overwhelm anyone.  Noodle is always so busy trying to get every degree and trying to prove to herself her own worth, and I sometimes feel left out in the cold or stressed beyond comprehension.

As a result, relaxation becomes sacred, but instead of relaxing I'm just creating more turmoil and work for myself.  I am trying to fix that, but my Short Rests often feel like mad scrambles to everything in.  I've spent my entire life feeling like I was late to the party, and I still feel like that today.  

Noodle gave me some advice, and she told me that I am wonderful.  She has a refrain.  I'll say, "I want to be a good Jacob," and she will respond, "You're the best Jacob."  As silly and juvenile as it might sound, it does help.  I love her very much, and I know she loves me, and I appreciate that love.

Tomorrow is the start of a new week, and hopefully, I will beat Persona 3:Reload.  I guess you'll find out next Sunday.

Sincerely,

RWS

P.S.

-Short Rest-


1. Sun: Persona 3: Reload/Anime/DnD5e

2. Mon: She-Hulk/Stardew Valley

3. Tue: Archer/Write Night

4. Wed: Batman: The Animated Series/Dragon Age: Inquisition

5. Thu: YouTube Watch Later/Fortnite/Discworld: The Color of Magic

6. Fri: Fantasy High: Sophomore Year/The Legend of Zelda

7. Sat: Baldur's Gate 3/Critical Role Campaign 3, Part II/Movie?


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