May 29, 2022

 Hello Internet,

The last two days have been quite pleasant.  I have been able to spend plenty of time with Monkey and Squirrel, and I have been prioritizing my time with them.  Tomorrow, however, will mark the beginning of my time at home as a House Husband (tm), and I am feeling anxious about how that will change things around my house and in my life.  I am feeling anxious about adhering to a schedule and about not adhering to the schedule, and I am afraid that my anxiety will produce the same problems which it has produced in the past.

To that end, I am trying to use this blog as a blog.  Since I will have more time to write, I will ideally have more time to put into blog posts.  I do not know what shape that will take, however, as I never have a real plan for anything I do.  Or, I do have plans, but they never seem to come to fruition.  I still intend on explaining how I write stories, but I might write those ahead of time rather than trying to remember where I was or what I was talking about as I go.

What I'm trying to say is, this blog will look different.  In part, I'll be posting again--I hope.  Beyond that, it is kind of a mystery.

-Making Promises-

I hate to make lists, but right now it's helping me to focus, and what is this blog if not a safe place to experiment.  After all, no one is reading, and even if someone should find this blog, well, then they will see me work through different things, embarrassing though that might be.

To that end, I will be making a few promises to myself:

I promise to keep updating and posting, to keep writing until my fingers fall off.

I promise to keep experimenting and growing as an artist, as a father, and as a person.

I promise to write the truth as I see it, even if I end up wrong sometimes.

I promise to be honest with myself, because it is only through self-honest and clarity of vision that we can make the world better.

I promise to never stop loving the world.  It is imperfect, but so am I, and so are the ones I love.  To only love something perfect is to never experience love to begin with.

I promise to work hard at whatever I do.  There is no final end to all of this, only a new beginning.  This is the new beginning, and that is the truth of Project Phoenix.

I promise to invest in the future.  Monkey, Squirrel, Kangaroo, I love you.

I promise to remember the good as well as the bad, because lately, I have only been seeing hurt, and that doesn't help anyone.

I promise to be bold.  The world is ruined either way.  At least, this way, I can make my mark.

I promise to never give up hope, because even that which is ruined can sometimes be salvaged.

-Keeping Promises-

Here, I had intended to tell how I intend to keep the promises I've made.  Then, I went and wrote more promises than I even know what to do with.  So, ultimately, I suppose the only way for me to keep my promises moving forward will be to write, to post, and to always endeavor to do better and be better.  The last few years have been difficult, for everybody, and I have been on the verge of losing all hope lately.  To keep my promises, I need to hold onto my hope, and I need to keep writing.  This post is healing me as I type it.  It is redeeming me, giving me a place to put my private thoughts but forcing me to refine them, to consider them, to weigh them, and to give them value.

-Moving Forward-

Moving forward, I will keep posting and using that sa a tool for self-evaluation and growth.  I might do posts like these, though I imagine that I will be experimenting with new pieces and will not be able to take the time or put the effort into something like this (as little effort as this is for me(on a side note, I am typing most of this with my eyes closed, feeling hte keys by instinct, allowing myself to be connected iwth myself, tuning out the world around me.  It feels refreshing.)).   Whatever I do, I will keep writing and, someday, hopefully, I will find someone to keep reading.

Until then...

Sincerely,

RWS

P.S.

-Short Rest-

Books

0. Main: Pyramids by Terry Pratchett

One Piece Vol. 80, Ch. 799: “Soldier’s Conviction”—806 27%  (4—11)

1. Sun: Boruto Vol. 3, Ch. 10: “My Story!!”-11 50% (3–4)

2. Mon: Demon Slayer: Kimetsu no Yaiba Vol. 1, Ch. 3: “Return by Dawn”-7 14% (3–7)

3. Tue: JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure Part 3: Stardust Crusaders Vol. 1, Ch. 3: “Jotaro Kujo part 3”-13 15% (3–13)

4. Wed: My Hero Academia Vol. 8, No. 67: “Stripping the Varnish”-71 44% (5–9)

My Hero Academia: Vigilantes Vol. 4, Ch. 19: “Family”-26 0% (1–8)

5. Thu: One-Punch Man Vol. 9, Punch 40: “The Man Who Wanted to be a Villain”-46.1 0% (1–11)

6. Fri: Ruroni Kenshin Vol. 6, Act 42: “You’ve No Idea”-47 25% (3–8)

7. Sat: (Fan Fiction) Final Fantasy: Fated bytinygaia Ch. 74% (38—50)

8. Squirrel: One Piece Vol. 17 Ch. 148—155

Reading Order:

-Fiction: Pyramids by Terry Pratchett 100%

-Library: Trans Medicine: The Emergence and Practice of Treating Gender by Stef M. Shuster 27% (50–183)

-YA: The Giver by Lois Lowry ?% (?–?)

-DnD5e: Player’s Handbook by Wizards of the Coast 0% (0–?)

-Non-Fiction: Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat by Samin Nosrat 0% (0–?)

View from the Cheap Seats by Neil Gaiman 26% (130–502)

-Reread:

Games

0. Main: Final Fantasy VIII

Final Fantasy IX

Chrono Cross: Radical Dreamer Edition 0%

1. Sun1: Final Fantasy X-2 HD Remaster 15% (8/52hrs)

Tales of Legendia

2. Mon: Kingdom Hearts RE: Coded 0% (0/26hrs)

3. Tue: DnD5e

4. Wed: Chrono Cross: Radical Dreamer Edition 0% (0/47hrs)

Dragon Age: Origins Kallian Tabris 14% (10/74hrs)

5. Thu: Movie

6. Fri: .hack//MUTATION 22% (23/50hrs(5/23hrs))

Bioshock 2

Bioshock: Infinite

7. Sat: Xenogears 9% (6/66hrs)

8. Freeplay: —

Shows

0. Main: Voltron: Legendary Defender Season 6

1. Critical Role: Campaign 2: “The Genesis Ward” 96% (135—141)

2. Funimation: Dragon Ball The General Blue Saga 42% 52—57 (7—12)

3. Owned: Firefly 14% (3—14)

4. Netflix: Moving Pictures Season 3 17% (2—6)

5. Online: Batman 36% (12—31)

6. Disney+: Star Wars: Visions 33% (4–9)

Gargoyles Season 1 0% (1—13)

7. Critical Role Campaign 2 11—17 65%

Moon Knight 17% (2–6)

Movies: Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind*

*I am about halfway through Nausicaa.