Sunday, May 28, 2023

2023 Week XXII

 Hello Internet,

Summer break.  Ah.  As a child, I loved it.  As an adult, it is a bit more harrowing.  My kids started summer break at the end of the last week, and the last few days have been...tense.  Monkey has been having daily tantrums for a few weeks now, and no amount of positive reinforcement or discussion is changing that.  So, she's been grounded to her room unless invited out until she can, you know, stop yelling at everyone.

Whenever Monkey is grounded, Ratatoskr begins having emotional disregulation.  This has a lot to do with the fact that Ratatoskr micromanages her behavior.  Like, he loves nothing more than to tell her what to do, but when she is grounded, they can't play together.  So, he mills about the house and tries to get into everyone else's business.  He's bored, and he's frustrated, and so he's picking at his sister even more, and it's creating even more chaos.

The two of them have been inconsolable for days now.  Monkey is evening out now that she is realizing she won't be allowed out of her room if she is screaming and throwing fits.  Ratatoskr is just beginning and has a short fuse.  We keep on trying to get him to visit friends around the neighborhood, but he is refusing to and is instead trying to sneak ways to be around his sister.  This is sweet in theory, but in praxis it is extremely frustrating.

Couple this with Kangaroo's sleep regression, and we have two very tired parents.  On the plus side, I have been getting some writing done (though not as much as I would like), and Noodle and I have been spending time together.  Both of those things are good.

I have a number of other, nonfiction projects I want to work on here, like the MCU Film Project I had started, but I have so little time for anything extra right now.  All of the stress has been causing me some emotional disregulation, and I'm feeling very burned out as a father, which kind of bleeds into everything else.  For right now, I think using this place as a venting area is probably the healthiest for me.

Summer Towers are coming up.

Well, until next time...

Sincerely,

RWS

P.S.

-Short Rest-


Schedule

1. Fullmetal Alchemist/Free/Critical Role: Campaign 3 Part I

2. One-Punch Man/Metal Gear/Outlaw Star

3. Discworld: The Color of Magic/DnD5e/Firefly

4. My Hero Academia/Fable: Anniversary/Seven Deadly Sins Season 1

5. Soul Eater/Mass Effect 3 Jean Shepard/Gargoyles

6. Boruto: The Next Generation/Nostalgia/Young Justice

7. Rest/Persona 3 Portable/Dimension 20: A Crown of Candy


Books

Tower: My Hero Academia: Vigilantes

1. Book: Fullmetal Alchemist Vol. 6, Ch. 24: “Fullmetal Alchemist”—Extra 60% (3—5)

2. One-Punch Man Vol. 18, Punch 91: “Let’s Go!”—94 0% (1—4)

3. Discworld:  The Color of Magic: Page 1—210 0%

4. My Hero Academia Vol. 14, Ch. 137: “Restraint!!”—137 89% (9—9)

5. Soul Eater Vol. 2, Ch. 3: “The ‘New Student’ and ‘Soul Observation’”—5 50% (3—4)

6. Boruto: The Next Generation Vol. 10, No. 39: “Proof”—39 75% (4—4)

7. Off


Games

Tower: Dragon Age: Origins Kallian Tabris 100%

0. Stardew Valley

1. Free Play

2. Short: Metal Gear 0% (0/5hrs)

3. DnD5e/Movie

4. Multiples: Mass Effect 3 Jean Shepard 2% (1/56hrs)

5. Free.

6. Long: Persona 3 Portable 74% (61/83hrs)

7. Free Play


Shows

Tower: Fullmetal Alchemist Season One 85% (24—26)

1. Critical Role: Campaign 3 Part I Ep. 3: “Trail and the Toll”—11 (Level Up to 5) 18% (3—11)

2. Anime: Outlaw Star 19% (6—26)

3. Online/Owned: Firefly 29% Disc 2 (5—14)

4. Netflix: Seven Deadly Sins Season 1 83% (21—24)

5. Disney+: Gargoyles Season 1 46% (7—13)

6. HBO: Young Justice Season 1 42% (12—26)

7. Dimension 20: A Crown of Candy: “Keep Sharp”—19 16% (4—19)

8. Movies: 14% (2—7)

Disney/Bambi

HBOMax/My Neighbor Totoro

Star Wars/Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back

Owned/Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within

Marvel/X2: X-Men United

Anime/.hack//LIMINALITY: “The Case of Yuki Aihara”

DCAU/Batman: Mask of the Phantasm


Sunday, May 21, 2023

2023 Week XXI.

 Hello Internet,

I feel like I say this often, but, I am tired.  A week ago, I interviewed for a position within the school district.  The interview went well, and the principal told me that she was putting my name forward to HR to offer me the job.  I am still waiting on the phone call.  As I've mentioned before on this blog, I feel like I have spent my entire life waiting, and I am so sick of it.

Part of the frustration is that I don't feel comfortable reaching out and setting up a daycare until I have an official job offer.  Furthermore, if Noodle and I get our preferred daycare, even with this higher paying job, we're looking at being a few hundred dollars in the hole every month.  This is, of course, better than being a thousand in the hole, but it is still a hole that we're in, and that isn't good the last time I checked.

Recently, I reached out to Monkey's hospital social worker for programs that can help us cover some of our bills while we wait.  She has not gotten back to me.  This is another round of frustrating as Noodle and I watch our bank account whittle away one bill at a time.  We have enough money to cover us through this month, but next month looks tight, and summer school money won't hit until July.

Every few weeks, I post an update detailing how tired I am.  This update feels a bit different.  This is burn out and fatigue, and I haven't even been doing anything different.  I think it is the stress of it all.  I am running as hard as I can, but it feels like the finish line is no closer, and all I keep thinking is, "Is this how life is supposed to be?"  I love my wife, and I love my family.  Sometimes, I even love my life, too, but the stress of society, of work, of bills...

I feel like it is burning me up, and like all I have left is ash.

Sincerely,

RWS

P.S.

-Short Rest-


Schedule

1. Fullmetal Alchemist/.hack//OUTBREAK/Critical Role: Campaign 3 Part I

2. One-Punch Man/Metal Gear/Outlaw Star

3. Discworld: The Color of Magic/DnD5e/Firefly

4. My Hero Academia/Fable: Anniversary/Seven Deadly Sins Season 1

5. Soul Eater/Mass Effect 3 Jean Shepard/Gargoyles

6. Boruto: The Next Generation/Nostalgia/Young Justice

7. Rest/Persona 3 Portable/Dimension 20: A Crown of Candy


Books

Tower: My Hero Academia: Vigilantes

1. Book: Fullmetal Alchemist Vol. 6, Ch. 24: “Fullmetal Alchemist”—Extra 60% (3—5)

2. One-Punch Man Vol. 18, Punch 90: “Manhole”—90 67% (3—3)

3. Discworld:  The Color of Magic: Page 1—?? 0%

4. My Hero Academia Vol. 14, Ch. 134: “Let’s Go, Gutsy Red Riot”—137 57% (6—9)

5. Soul Eater Vol. 2, Ch. 2: Remedial Lessons Part 2”A—5 25% (2—4)

6. Boruto: The Next Generation Vol. 10, No. 38: “He’s Bad News”—39 50% (3—4)

7. Off


Games

Tower: Dragon Age: Origins Kallian Tabris 100%

0. Stardew Valley

1. .hack//OUTBREAK ??% (?/21(41?/63hrs))

2. Metal Gear 0% (0/5hrs)

3. Dnd5e/Movies

4. Fable: Anniversary Evil Playthrough 0% (0/21hrs)

5. Mass Effect 3 Jean Shepard 2% (1/56hrs)

6. Nostalgia 0% (0/31hrs)

7. Persona 3 Portable 74% (61/83hrs)


Shows

Tower: Fullmetal Alchemist Season One 85% (23—26)

1. Critical Role: Campaign 3 Part I Ep. 3: “Trail and the Toll”—11 (Level Up to 5) 18% (3—11)

2. Anime: Outlaw Star 19% (6—26)

3. Online/Owned: Firefly 29% Disc 2 (5—14)

4. Netflix: Seven Deadly Sins Season 1 83% (21—24)

5. Disney+: Gargoyles Season 1 46% (7—13)

6. HBO: Young Justice Season 1 42% (12—26)

7. Dimension 20: A Crown of Candy: “Keep Sharp”—19 16% (4—19)

8. Movies: 14% (2—7)

Disney/Bambi

HBOMax/My Neighbor Totoro

Star Wars/Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back

Owned/Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within

Marvel/X2: X-Men United

Anime/.hack//LIMINALITY: “The Case of Yuki Aihara”

DCAU/Batman: Mask of the Phantasm

Sunday, May 14, 2023

2023 Week XX.

 Hello Internet,

Good news!  I (very likely) have a job lined up for the school year, and it's a real-to-life teaching job, as well.  Now, I say very likely because of the regular bureaucracy of education.  To tell it short: I interviewed for and was told by the principal the next day that my name was being put forward to be hired and to wait on a phone call from HR.  Technically speaking, I am not hired until HR makes the offer, and I accept the offer.  Principals aren't supposed to tell their prospective employees about their hiring decisions, but I have never worked at a school that didn't tell me ahead of time that I was going to be hired, so there you go.

This means a number of good and bad things for me.  On the good side: I don't have to job hunt anymore!  I hate job hunting with the bitterest of passions, and I am glad to be done with that.  This is also one of the few districts that could pay me adequately enough to justify a return to in-person working.  So, I will have to give up on remote work for now, but I will be working in a building I am excited about and with an age group that I am passionate about.  I'll also be teaching ELA, which is exciting on its own!

On the bad side: I will have less time to write and will have to figure out a writing schedule that will work for me.  Being a first year teacher also comes with added work for me, including silly meetings.  I'll be working with Middle Grades students, too, which means parent-teacher conferences.  Kangaroo will have to be put in a daycare, which I am excited and nervous about.  I love that little dude, and it will be hard to be away from him, but I think it will be good for him.

The added money will be good for the household and for Noodle, and this will be something akin to a return to normalcy for us.  From here, we can start rebuilding a lot of the resources we spent while I was out of work with Monkey (whose treatment is about to change in a good way).  Things are looking up, and I am excited for the first time in a while.  So, here's to waiting for the phone call that will redefine my entire life.

Sincerely,

RWS

P.S.

-Short Rest-


Schedule

1. Fullmetal Alchemist/Nostalgia/Critical Role: Campaign 3 Part I

2. One-Punch Man/Fable: Anniversary Evil/Outlaw Star

3. My Hero Academia/DnD5e/Firefly

4. The Emperor and I/Kingdom Hearts: Final Mix HD Remix+/Seven Deadly Sins Season 1

5. 7th Garden/Mass Effect 3 Jean Shepard/Gargoyles

6. Boruto: The Next Generation/.hack//OUTBREAK/Young Justice

7. Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat by Samin Nosrat/Persona 3 Portable/Dimension 20: Tiny Heist


Books

Tower: My Hero Academia: Vigilantes

0. One Piece 100% New Chapters Every…

1. Sun: Fullmetal Alchemist Vol. 5, Ch. 21: “The Brothers’ Secret”—21 100% (5—5)

2. Mon: One-Punch Man Vol. 18, Punch 88: “Because I’m a Monster”—90 00% (1—3)

3. Tue: My Hero Academia Vol. 14, No. 133: “Catch Up, Kirishima”—137 44% (5—9)

4. Wed: The Emperor and I Vol. 2, Ch. 19: “Emperor and His Health”—18 88% (15—16)

5. Thu: Soul Eater Vol 2, Ch. 2: “Remedial Lessons (Part 2”—Ch. 5 25% (2—4)

6. Fri: Boruto: The Next Generation Vol.10, No. 37: “United Front!!”—39 25% (2—4)

7. Sat: Books

-Fiction: Pyramids by Terry Pratchett

-Library: Trans Medicine: The Emergence and Practice of Treating Gender by Stef M. Shuster

-YA: The Giver by Lois Lowry

-Fan Fiction: Final Fantasy: Fated to Ch. 50 by tinygaia Ch. 50—50, 100% 

-Nonfiction: Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat by Samin Nosrat 12% (54—440)

View from the Cheap Seats by Neil Gaiman 26% (130—502)

-DnD5e: Player’s Handbook by Wizards of the Coast 0% (?—??)

-Reread


Games

Tower: Dragon Age: Origins Kallian Tabris 100%

0. Stardew Valley

1. Backlog/Nostalgia 0% (0/31hrs)

2. Multiples/Fable: Anniversary Evil 0% (0/21hrs)

3. DnD5e/Movies

4. Replay/Kingdom Hearts: Final Mix+ 0% (0/16 Trophies)

5. Mass Effect 3 Jean Shepard 2% (1/56hrs)

6. Series/.hack//OUTBREAK ??% (?/21(41/63))

7. Free/Persona 3 Portable 74% (61/83hrs)


Shows

Tower: Fullmetal Alchemist Season One 84% (22—25)

1. Critical Role: Campaign 3 Part I Ep. 3: “Trail and the Toll”—11 (Level Up to 5) 18% (3—11)

2. Anime: Outlaw Star 19% (6—26)

3. Online/Owned: Firefly 29% Disc 2 (5—14)

4. Netflix: Seven Deadly Sins Season 1 83% (21—24)

5. Disney+: Gargoyles Season 1 46% (7—13)

6. HBO: Young Justice Season 1 42% (12—26)

7. Dimension 20: A Crown of Candy: “Keep Sharp”—19 16% (4—19)

8. Movies: 14% (2—7)

Disney/Bambi

HBOMax/My Neighbor Totoro

Star Wars/Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back

Owned/Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within

Marvel/X2: X-Men United

Anime/.hack//LIMINALITY: “The Case of Yuki Aihara”

DCAU/Batman: Mask of the Phantasm